Everybody knows that most men are not hard to please. If you know what I mean… and I think you do! The goal of this post is to better understand the potential benefits of intimacy. It’s a process that we develop into, not a perfection that is randomly given to a select few. Every man can and should grow in this area! Lets look at how we can see Intimacy in HD…
1. Embrace the Chase… Intimacy is an evolving process too difficult to master without God . Once you think you have conquered your wife’s desires, likes, dislikes, needs etc… think again. Once we think we have her figured out and wrapped around our little finger, she unleashes an atomic bomb of emotions that blasts us into reality. What man doesn’t like a good chase anyway? It’s what makes marriage fun and interesting! God designed your wife to be an ever changing creation hiding in the tangled mess of life’s dangerous terrain, to be rescued and protected from harm. If she feels like you don’t care to seek her out in some way, intimacy begins to wain. EMBRACE THE CHASE! It’s fun. Most women love that their husbands chase them…they WILL test you! Trust me! They want to know that even though you’ve already “caught” them, they are still worth chasing…and that you still have FUN chasing them.
2. The Warm-Up… If I want food NOW, I microwave a meal (or poor a bowl of cereal). It’s fast, convenient and satisfying. I do not put much time and thought into it. Men are like microwavable meals that can be heated up within minutes. Seriously, it does not take much for us to get intimate. Once we know intimacy is inevitable, the launch sequence is activated and Houston is simply counting down from 10. Women on the other hand are designed to warm up with time, trust, love and affection. Your wife is not a microwave. She is more like a crock-pot. My wife likes to make crock-pot meals on Sundays. She puts all the ingredients in the pot before we leave for church, and by lunch we have a fantastic meal. The meal took 6 hours to cook, simmer, roast, boil and prepare. Intimacy for your wife begins weeks and months before the show. She is prepared through the way you treated her the past month. She’s marinated with the way you embraced her when you came home from work. She’s seasoned with the way you play with your children, and how clean your body is. She’s tenderized by how messy the house is, the comfort of the bedroom, the bills being paid etc… and the list goes on. You not only have to take into account all of these ingredients but you have to give her time to warm up! Be patient and work hard at being the man of her dreams. It takes TIME, but it’s so worth it!!
3. Holding Back…Have you ever played a sport with a guy who played for himself? I have. He may be the best player on the roster, but if he plays for himself chances are the whole team is going to lose. Intimacy is not a game you can play for yourself. You have to include your wife in accomplishing a win. You have to give up the desire of a heroic score in order for her to be part of the team. You are not the goal in the marriage bed… its a team effort. Your wife’s desires and needs are the goal in intimacy. You may get what you wanted out of her.. but did she get what she needed out of you? Never make your wife feel uncomfortable doing things that do not fit her delicately designed womanhood. She is the prize God gave you, treat her like your most cherished possession and not your most used lazy boy. When your wife is completely satisfied, you have then reached the goal! SCORE!
4. Walk in the Spirit…I think you know where I am going with this. You and I cannot be intimate without being intimate with God. The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance. You cannot become the man your wife desires outside of walking in the Spirit. As the Spirit has full control of you, you will have complete satisfaction in intimacy. The chase will become an adventure, the preparation will be a joy, and her fulfillment will become your goal. I hope something said will be a help to you as you continue this awesome journey with your wife.
Thanks for taking time to read!